Short Fat Fanny and The Rape Clause

man and woman arguing
man and woman arguing
man and woman arguing
man and woman arguing


This is so hard to believe that you’ll need to check it out as it is true.

A local woman widely known as Short Fat Fanny told me at a Scottish Tory meeting that she was protesting because she couldn’t get benefit for her third child. I asked why not and she was amazed that your roving investigative reporter had not heard of the rape clause.

“What’s “the rape clause”? I asked innocently.

“Ye English are aal the same,” she said as banged me on the shoulder. “Ye knaa nowt.”

I protested I was Geordie and Fanny said I should knaa better.

“If you claim for a third child you divvent git benefit unless you can prove ye were raped.”

I stared at her in disbelief. “Ye didn’t knaa, did ye? It’s because aal those Tory papers don’t report it cause they’re ashamed aboot it.

I said she might be right but they should be ashamed about more than that.


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